Why do people think im gay

So basically people think I’m gay, but I have no idea why. They say it’s the way I behave, which frustrates me because I’m straight and I don’t want to be seen as the stereotypical overly ladylike (gay) guy. You ask, “If there’s nothing I can do to convince people I’m not gay, then am I really gay?” Clearly, you are whatever you are, no matter what anyone else thinks. Why does everyone think I’m gay? It is a question I asked myself a lot as a child, but not one I’ve cared to ask in my adult years.

This is primarily due to personal growth. It is that subconscious thought that gay is bad that allows lawmakers to move with minimum pushback, and sometimes even worse, support. In case no one has told you lately, it doesn’t matter how others perceive you. Why are some people gay? Why are some people straight? We don’t know. Some people feel they were born this way, that their orientation was always just a part of them.

Medically reviewed by Janet Brito, Ph. I have observed this symptom in young children, adolescents, and adults as well. What Does Being Asexual Mean? Not behaving sexually with members of the opposite sex just to check your own reactions. A typical example would be a heterosexual man who experiences an erection while looking at gay erotica. What can you recommend I should do?

In This Section. They provide help and support for people who are in crisis or feeling suicidal, or for people who simply need someone to talk to and vent to. Avoiding associating with anyone who may be gay or who seems to lean in that direction if the sufferer is heterosexual.

Why do people think i'm gay even though i'm not

Boston College Libraries. To submit a question for a future column, fill out this form. IRL, you don't ever have to settle on a label if you don't want to.

The older psychoanalytic therapies often make people with this problem feel much worse by saying that the thoughts represent true inner desires. I must always have certainty and control in life intolerance of uncertainty. What compulsions do accomplish is to cause the sufferer to become behaviorally addicted to performing them. By allowing the anxiety to subside on its own, you slowly build up your tolerance to it, and it begins to take more and more to make you anxious.

Listening to minute audio tapes or tape loops about the feared subject. Doubting something so basic about yourself can obviously be quite a torturous business. Thank you for being so supportive and for sharing your story honestly. Making a series of three-minute tapes that based on the writings gradually suggest more and more that you are gay, and listening to them several times a day changing them when they no longer bother you.

I must be in control of all my thoughts and emotions at all times. Fred Penzel, PhD, is a licensed psychologist who has specialized in the treatment of OCD and related disorders since Going a step beyond this, some sufferers have obsessions that tell them that they may have acted, or will act, on their thoughts.

How do I know whether I prefer women or men? The two are actually physiologically similar in some ways. As I like to explain to my patients, their problem is not the thoughts themselves, but instead it is what they make of the thoughts, as well as their attempts to relieve their anxiety via compulsions and avoidance.

OCD, as we know, is largely about experiencing severe and unrelenting doubt.